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jose
07.07.16, 04:35 PM
ahhh, pag-ibig! o, magpakatotoo, iwasan ang ideyalismo. alam na nating lahat kung ano ang dapat. ang nais nating malaman e kung ano ang iyong masasabi based from experience, may not be your own. malay mo, your input might save a relationship.

...so pano, simulan ko na?

how do you differentiate "love" from "being in love"? (i.e. i love you; i am in love with you) so, if somebody tells you "i think i love you but i'm not in love with you", how would you make that person feel otherwise?


tantan...
"...i feel it in my fingers, i feel it in my to-hoes..." :)

yuanbautista
07.07.16, 11:21 PM
May problema ka ba sa love? :)

kateri
07.07.16, 11:44 PM
how do you differentiate "love" from "being in love"? (i.e. i love you; i am in love with you) so, if somebody tells you "i think i love you but i'm not in love with you", how would you make that person feel otherwise?

to love is a commitment.."despite" of another person's faults, u choose to love...kung baga, "unconditional" sya...such as the love of a mother towards her child...

wherelse if u are "in love" or "fall in love" with a person, then there is a tendency to "fall out of love"...diba?

may sense ba sinabi ko? hehe...just my two cents...

Alna_lou
07.07.17, 09:00 AM
wow....may mga Dr. Love pala dito...
may question lang poh ako...

HOW DO YOU KNOW NA LOVE MO ANG ISANG TAO? and at the same time HOW COULD YOU KNOW THAT SHE ALSO LOVES YOU? (parang what are the signs and symptoms...) :):):)

bingo
07.07.17, 09:56 AM
basta nagmahal po tayo inspite of anything that comes our way, kahit hindi tayo mahalin in return - - - para sa akin ito ang true love... "loving inspite of..."

jose
07.07.17, 10:23 AM
May problema ka ba sa love? :)

haha... i knew somebody would ask, but no bro yuan, hindi ako. i just read a blog of a close friend of mine and i wanted to give my opinion. as i was typing my reply i realized, the question is indeed difficult for me to answer without being idealistic or sounding martyr particularly with the question "how would you make the other person feel otherwise?". naintriga ako and i thought of posting the same question here. any insights?

hi kateri. medyo naguluhan ako, hehe... uhm, pano ko iaapply yun sa line na "i think i love you but i'm not in love with you" ?

hola bro leo! i agree with bro bingo that loving someone (let's narrow it down to the opposite sex) is about giving yourself to that person wholeheartedly without expecting anything (as in anything) in return. if the other person feels the same, then you are a match made in heaven ika nga. the question is "could you live with this kind of life?" (i mean expecting nothing in return?). i believe that is why "true love" is so elusive. mahirap makahanap ng ganitong tao kase martyr sya! martyr!... often, extreme infatuation is being mistaken as love, that is why, after sometime when the infatuation (or that something which is infatuating) fades, hala, the problem begins. same thing with married couples, when the "honeymoon" fades, the problem begins. so how would you know if you truly love a person to the point of spending your whole life with him/her (or kahit na bf/gf pa lang)? ask yourself why would you like to spend your life with this person? are you willing to do or give everything it takes whatever happens? are you ready to accept worse changes (better is good but worse may be difficult to accept)? the questions should all be about you giving and not receiving. kasi masarap mag-receive, mahirap mag-give di ba? hala, yan na nga ba ang sinasabi ko e, please pardon the idealism if i sounded like it. just my 2cents...

sus! pasensya na leo kung masyadong napalayo yung sagot ko sa tanong mo, i got carried away nang sobrang layo e, hehe...

Alna_lou
07.07.17, 10:37 AM
basta nagmahal po tayo inspite of anything that comes our way, kahit hindi tayo mahalin in return - - - para sa akin ito ang true love... "loving inspite of..."

wow...tnx for ur insight pareng Bingo...I just realized that IM FALLING! wahahahaha :P :blush: :heart: :love:

titopao
07.07.17, 02:37 PM
Hmmm...maboteng usapan \'to. (Pakisimulan na po ang pagtagay ;) ) Just joking, hindi ako magdadrama dito :)

I don\'t want to speculate about your friend as your friend\'s experience may have been different from ours. Ang sa ganang akin, I\'ve realized that being in love is a temporary thing, just like our feelings. And, also, it\'s possible to love without having to be in love, although hindi masyadong clear sa akin ang context ng pagkakasabi ng nun sa friend mo, so I can\'t speculate (kasi it could mean one thing and another thing at the same time).

Sa case ko kasi, I was once involved in a relationship with a girl who i wasn\'t attracted to at the beginning (\"okay, she\'s cute, but she\'s not my type\")...pero natutunan kong mahalin dahil sa mga pinagdaanan namin sa buhay. That relationship has long ended though (and not as happy as you\'d expect it to be), but all the same that experience taught me na, in love, there is more to attraction (\"being in love\" or infatuation) than meets the eye. Siguro, pag talagang dumating sa point na what you see isn\'t important but what you see within and what you see through that matters...then maybe you can call that love.

Re: alna_lou\'s question (related kasi sa sagot ko):

Sa case ko, hindi ako nagkaroon ng problema na alamin kung mahal nya ako kasi...siya mismo ang gumawa ng paraan para iparamdam sa akin na mahal din nya ako. Nung una, hindi ko kaagad na-gets, but there was this moment na na-realize ko what she was up to...and then I knew. Kung mahal ka ng isang tao, hindi sapat na sabihin lang nya sa yo yon (since it\'s easy to say something); paninindigan nya yon sa mga kilos nya, at sa pag-aaruga niya sa iyo.

Although I did love her so much, I regret that, later, I wasn\'t as steadfast in my love for her as she was to me. (Sorry, I can\'t elaborate on that.) However, I do know that I loved her so much that I was willing to endure for her sake, that I was willing to wait for her when needed, that I was ready to provide her with moral and emotional support when she needed to, that all I wanted was for her to be happy in her life. I loved her so much that, at that time, I realized that I was willing to share life with her.

Kung meron man akong kailangang balikan at ipagpasalamat sa ugnayang iyon, iyon ay isang pagtanaw ng utang na loob sa kanya na pinaunlakan niya ako, at binigyan ng pagkakataon, na ipakita sa kanya na mahal na mahal ko siya. At wala na akong ibang hihilingin pa sa kanya.

Alna_lou
07.07.17, 03:52 PM
tnx for the enlightenment Titopao (at first, I thought ur a gal...:)) and Pareng Jose...pwede kayo i hire sa mga radio stations bilang si "DR LOVE" LOL LOL

Time is your most precious gift because you only have a limited amount of it. You can make more money but you can’t make more time. When you give someone more time you are giving out a portion of your life that you will never get back. Your time is your life. That is why the greatest gift you can give someone is your time.
It is not enough just to say relationships are important; we must prove it by investing time in them. Words alone are worthless. Relationships take time and effort, and the best way to spell love is “T-I-M-E”

titopao
07.07.17, 04:10 PM
You\'re welcome :D

Agree ako dun sa pinost mo. Lahat ng bagay-bagay sa buhay natin, nadidiktahan ng panahon. \"Dikta\" in the sense that, time is passing you by. Dilemma talaga yun for some people. If you have doubts, if you hesitate, it may be too late. And if you make a mistake, you can\'t turn back time.

Haaayyyy.... :)

Bonnie
07.07.17, 08:42 PM
Love, masyadong malalim ang kahulugan nito sa kin, pero saking palagay, ma te test mo talaga ito sa panahong dumadaan na kasama mo ang mahal mo sa buhay, sakin, wala akong ibang hangad sa buhay maging simple at masaya ang mahal ko sa araw araw na kasama ko sya, masayang masaya na ko... Di ko na rin alintana ang mga darating pang mga araw, ang importante sakin ay ngayon, kasama ko sya, kaakibat sa hirap at ginhawa, simple at matiwasay na pamumuhay. Dumating man ang panahong ako o sya man ay mawala, pero saking puso, lagi syang nakaukit, at pilit na gugunitain ang magaganda at masarap na buhay na aking ginugol kasama sya.

yuanbautista
07.07.17, 10:50 PM
when you love someone, you accept everything about that person.

One question, who would you rather choose: taong mahal mo pero di ka mahal o taong mahal ka pero di mo mahal? And why?

titopao
07.07.18, 06:25 AM
One question, who would you rather choose: taong mahal mo pero di ka mahal o taong mahal ka pero di mo mahal? And why?

Hmmm...magandang topic to. (Okay, just to remind everyone, the topic is about romantic love, so that filters out the other nuances of the word Love ;) )

Kung pipiliin ko yung taong mahal ko pero hindi ako mahal...that means I would love this person even though this person may not love me back. It takes a lot of sacrifice, and that would also mean that I am putting in a lot of investment in something that might give me nothing in return. But still, that does not stop me from providing all my love for this person because to love is a pleasurable thing both for the one who is giving it and (if I must add, must be) for the one who is receiving it (at least, this other person would have a basic appreciation of being treated with care).

Kung pipiliin ko yung taong mahal ako pero hindi ko mahal...well, at least I can treat this person as a friend (there is nothing in the question that says I cannot do this). Common decency dictates that if we are not really close with someone, at least we respect them for who they are and be as friendly with them as possible. To be honest with everyone, I cannot remember having been in a situation such as this (i.e. someone loves me but I was not aware of it), but at the very least I do my best to be in good terms with people around me and appreciate any acts of kindness given to me.

So given a choice...I don\'t know really. Siguro may slight bias ako for the second one (mahal ako pero di ko mahal) kasi kung baga it is a default behavior for me. That means that if some girl turns out to be so much in love with me and shows it in her actions, she can expect that I would be treating her with the same respect and care that I give to most of my friends, even though I may not necessarily share her innermost feelings :)

bingo
07.07.18, 10:29 AM
wow...tnx for ur insight pareng Bingo...I just realized that IM FALLING! wahahahaha :P :blush: :heart: :love:


good luck bro... ipagpatuloy mo yan...

Tracy
07.07.18, 02:15 PM
pasali po kahit di pa ko naiinlove

kung ako po papipiliin, i'll choose yung taong mahal ako kahit hindi ko mahal. kasi para saken natuturuan ang puso. so kung alam kong mahal nya ko, eventually matututunan ko rin sya mahalin. pag pinili ko kasi yung mahal ko pero hindi naman ako mahal, parang ang sakit, 1 way lang yung feelings. hindi mo kontrolado kung mamahalin ka din ba nya. pero kung dun ka sa mahal ka, kahit pano your heart is safe from heartaches.

Point of view ko lang po.. :)

jose
07.07.18, 03:07 PM
sus! tracy? pwede ba yun hindi ka pa nai-in love?
leo, sang-ayon ako sa iyong tinuran that time is the most precious gift anyone could give someone.
pareng bonnie and titopao, thanks for sharing. nothing beats speaking from experience.

on yuan's dilemma...
haha, naunahan mo lang akong magtanong bro! but for me i'd choose somebody who loves me kahit hindi ko mahal cause i know that i could offer something greater than what she could give me. i know that i have so much love in me that only someone who loves me deserves it. ika nga ni tracy, madaling turuan ang sariling puso, pero mahirap turuang magmahal ang puso ng iba kasi sa totoo lang, hindi mo sila kilala.

on loving someone and being in love with someone...
thanks for the inputs guys. i suddenly came up with this idea (please correct me if i got it wrong) that love is something deeper than being in love. you may take away the feeling of being in love though you still love that person. in essence, being in love is the "infatuation" in a lovers' relationship. so, when somebody tells you, "i think i love you but i'm not in love with you", that person simply means "i am staying here with you but show me something that would ignite my infatuation with you". sooo... if you weren't able to give what she's asking for (i.e. infatuation), you might find her always annoyed with you and the things that you do, you may find her always looking at your faults and not what you did for her (i.e. sinundo mo na nga sya pa galit kasi na-late ka ng konte e hindi naman nya alam kung ano pinagdaanan mo para makarating sa lugar kung nasan sya, di ba? hehe...), or you may even find her unhappy. if it stayed that way, that is the time that even the love that she has for you may be lost. tsk! tsk! then it is time to make a move before all is lost. whew! scary thought...

michaela
07.07.18, 03:17 PM
how do you differentiate "love" from "being in love"? (i.e. i love you; i am in love with you) so, if somebody tells you "i think i love you but i'm not in love with you", how would you make that person feel otherwise?

obviously the feeling is not mutual if that the case. Just Move on.Problems concerning the affairs of the heart cannot be remedied right away. Letting go is part of problem management. Many suffer from broken-heartedness because they do not want to move on.

When love comes into our lives we should be thankful because it brings out the best and the good in all of us. But when it leaves us and goes against our will we should only be sorry for a while for there should be no room for hatred to grow in our hearts .

I'm going to give you a nice well-written post about love : here it is just click this (http://blurryshadesofgrey.blogspot.com/2005/06/all-or-nothing.html) don't worry guys this is not a virus or spam. I just totally loved that post a lot:)at least everyone is happy at least the tension with the dwtl people is over.

titopao
07.07.18, 04:07 PM
love is something deeper than being in love.

Heheheh...Mismo :D

yuanbautista
07.07.18, 11:35 PM
kasi para saken natuturuan ang puso. so kung alam kong mahal nya ko, eventually matututunan ko rin sya mahalin.

hello tracy,
kung sakaling natutunan mo na nga siyang mahalin, at bigla namang minahal ka na ng totoong mahal mo. Sino sa kanila ang magiging mas matimbang sa yo at pipiliin mo?

Tracy
07.07.19, 12:07 AM
parang mas mahirap yung tanong mo kesa sa puzzle thread ah.. hmmmmm.... siguro dun na lang ako sa taong natutunan ko nang mahalin, kasi alam kong matagal na nya kong mahal and mahal ko nadin sya, kasi nga natutunan ko na. kung yung totoong mahal ko, matutunan ako mahalin, too late kasi mahal ko na yung nagmahal saken. parang ang gulo ng sagot ko.. hirap kasi e.. hehe... :)

diane
07.07.19, 08:18 AM
parang mas mahirap yung tanong mo kesa sa puzzle thread ah.. hmmmmm.... siguro dun na lang ako sa taong natutunan ko nang mahalin, kasi alam kong matagal na nya kong mahal and mahal ko nadin sya, kasi nga natutunan ko na. kung yung totoong mahal ko, matutunan ako mahalin, too late kasi mahal ko na yung nagmahal saken. parang ang gulo ng sagot ko.. hirap kasi e.. hehe... :)


Tracy- sabi nila, mas nagwowork and relationship pag mas mahal ka ng lalake (so yan ang ideal) pero ako kase, mas gusto ko ako ang mas may mahal- kse masaya ako nagmamahal? di naman martyr? pero i guess i am just saying, i'd rather be with someone who I really in-love with..kse to be in a so-so relationship would be torture for me!

jose
07.07.19, 11:01 AM
hello tracy,
kung sakaling natutunan mo na nga siyang mahalin, at bigla namang minahal ka na ng totoong mahal mo. Sino sa kanila ang magiging mas matimbang sa yo at pipiliin mo?

hmmm...familiar situation... i was already in love with someone when this other girl i was courting suddenly told me she already loves me. i know she was in that situation where i loved her but she loved someone else and her someone else loved someone else, then she chose to love me instead. well i guess she was way too late and there was nothing she could do to turn my feelings around. moral of the story? don't let the feelings wait cause they fade away if not nurtured. funny thing was, the one i chose was then loving someone else too and she also had to choose. can you imagine how complicated my life was? hehe...

titopao
07.07.19, 11:45 AM
re Jose: I totally agree, don\'t let it wait. It WILL be too late.

However, it doesn\'t mean that you can indiscriminately tell your feelings. A little subtlety is needed. Ika nga, kelangan mong i-balance and i-control yung feelings mo depending on the situation.

Ako naman, dumating ako sa point na masyado akong nag-hold back even if it was too obvious for other people na gusto ako ng girl. Actually, nalaman ko lang yung bit about her feelings long after the two of us were no longer seeing each other, so there was nothing that I could do about it anyway =I

Ngayon, the situation is a bit more complicated for me (ibang babae naman ito ;) ): it\'s clear for other people that I really have something on her, pero hindi pa sya ready na pumasok sa isang relationship even though everything is going well with us. You might say that everything\'s going well with us and I should go for it, but I hesitate to say more except that...we\'re talking of a potential long-distance relationship here (as in, way, way distant) :)

Alna_lou
07.07.19, 11:51 AM
pasali po kahit di pa ko naiinlove
r u sure Tracy?

good luck bro... ipagpatuloy mo yan...
yap pareng Bingo...its always nice to fall in love...it makes life more meaningful and beautiful...I guess EVERYONE IN THIS WORLD IS BEING LOVED AND/OR FALLIN' IN LOVE! ryt? :love: :love: :love:

titopao
07.07.19, 12:08 PM
yap pareng Bingo...its always nice to fall in love...it makes life more meaningful and beautiful...I guess EVERYONE IN THIS WORLD IS BEING LOVED AND/OR FALLIN\' IN LOVE! ryt? :love: :love: :love:

Absolutely correct :D

Let me share something that I wrote for a very special someone (ahem ahem :) )

\"Everyone wishes: to have someone to love, to be cared for, to be nurtured, to share life, to fully experience the joy of living.

To sip the nectar of love\'s delight. To breathe in the full ecstasy of loving. To love, and to be loved in return.

These are what everyone wishes for, deep in their hearts.\"

Love is such a wonderful feeling and a wonderful experience. Don\'t deny yourselves that chance to love and to be loved :D

Tracy
07.07.19, 01:39 PM
hi lou! yes i'm sure, di pa talaga ko naiinlove, i dont know what's wrong with me.. pero hindi pa talaga e.. :(

diane
07.07.20, 12:40 AM
Ngayon, the situation is a bit more complicated for me (ibang babae naman ito ;) ): it\'s clear for other people that I really have something on her, pero hindi pa sya ready na pumasok sa isang relationship even though everything is going well with us. You might say that everything\'s going well with us and I should go for it, but I hesitate to say more except that...we\'re talking of a potential long-distance relationship here (as in, way, way distant) :)

"Love knows no distance... temporary lang naman yung distance until you decide it to be permanent, i am sure if this is God's will - He will make ways, open doors for you to be together..Pray about this to your guardian angel and hers....

yuanbautista
07.07.21, 07:47 PM
Some Thoughts...:)




Message: INLOVE ka ba or LOVE mo sya?

kala ko dati pareho lang iba pala!!

basahin para maliwanagan naman tayo.

It's definitely different when you "love someone
and when you're inlove with someone"

explanation:

alin nga ba ang mas malalim?

Loving someone or Being in love with someone?

marami sa atin ang na confused tungkol dito.

Ikaw ba ay may girlfriend o boyfriend ngayon?

Mahal mo ba siya pero parang may isang tao
na parang mahalaga din sa 'yo.

o may mahal ka na akala mo eh mahal mo nga
siya pero meron ka pa rin isang tao na
minamahal ng totoo.

Kapag love mo ang isang tao masaya ka..

Feeling mo ok na ang lahat...

pero ang ma-inlove ka, ang siyang pinakamasakit
sa lahat!

Kasi ang mga taong inlove ay ang mga taong
nagsasakripisyo at nagpaparaya.

Teka bakit ka nga ba nagpaparaya?

Dahil ba hindi ka niya mahal o dahil hindi ka
siguradong ok lang sa kanya?

Kung yan ang dahilan mo, walang duda
na inlove ka nga sa kanya.

Kasi iniisip mo kung anong meron kayo sa ngayon
ang tanging mahalaga at kontento ka na.

Pero isipin mo paano kung mawala ang taong yon
at talagang hindi na kayo mag-usap at
magkita, kaya mo ba?

Paano naman kung sayo siya inlove at ibinigay
niya ang lahat para sayo pero hindi mo
napahalagahan ang lahat ng ito kaagad!

Paano kung isang araw naguluhan na siya
sayo ng husto at maisipang lumayo na lang?

Paano kung sa sobrang pagiging iba mo sa
kanya di ka na niya kausapin at tuldukan
na niya ng tuluyan kung ano na ang meron kayo?

Then bigla mong na realize kung gaano
ka-importante sayo ang bawat isa kaya lang
wala na siya!

Kaya mo ba?

Kung hindi ang sagot mo, malinaw na inlove
ka nga...

Paano naman pag mahal mo lang,
kapag mahal mo lang, alam mo na
palagi kang may choice, ayaw mo siyang mawala dahil
alam mong wala kang ipapalit.

Yung masaya ka sa kanya pero sa gabi
hindi naman siya ang iniisip mo.

Mahal mo siya pero aminado ka sa sarili mo
na balang araw hindi siya ang pakakasalan mo.

Mahal mo siya pero ang puso mo hindi
lang para sa kanya..

Mahal mo at masasaktan ka pagnawala siya
pero alam mo na kaya mo yon.

Ngayon anong nararamdaman mo
:
DO YOU LOVE SOMEONE or YOU'RE
INLOVE WITH SOMEONE?

Isang araw magigising ka na lang na
INLOVE
ka na nga pero kahit anong gawin mo ay
huli na.

Dahil maaaring yung taong INLOVE din
sayo ay wala na pala.

Tandaan mo: Masyadong mapaglaro ang
puso huwag tayo magpaloko!!!

We learn to love someone pero minsan lang
dumating sa atin ang pagkakataong ma-
inlove!!!

Kaya kapag dumating ito, ano ang
gagawin mo?

jose
07.07.23, 12:56 PM
salamat bro yuan sa iyong input... ngayon naman may bagong angle dun sa tanong kong
how do you differentiate "love" from "being in love"? (i.e. i love you; i am in love with you) so, if somebody tells you "i think i love you but i'm not in love with you", how would you make that person feel otherwise?
anybody else na may input sa angle na to? let me make it clear that we're not starting a debate here. gusto ko lang po malaman yung opinion naman ng iba, other side of the coin ika nga. thanks. :)

Tracy
07.07.23, 01:47 PM
For me, when you say "i love you" to someone and you really mean it, it means you really love the person, but not necessarily "in love" with him/her. There are many kinds of love, we often say i love you to our parents, relatives, friends, etc. but that kind of love is not intimate. when we say "i'm in love with you", for me it's a different level of love. it's personal and intimate.

- point of view ko lang po. :)

kateri
07.07.24, 11:58 PM
when you love someone, you accept everything about that person.

One question, who would you rather choose: taong mahal mo pero di ka mahal o taong mahal ka pero di mo mahal? And why?

i've been asking myself the same question for some time now...but until now, i don't really know who i'd choose...ang masasabi ko lang, although pwede turuan ang puso magmahal, mahirap pa rin! hehehe...

but wouldn't it be nicer if the one you love, loves you back in the same way...then it would be perfect! :D

sabi nga ng txt message ng friend ko:

"there are three great things in the world. 1st is for you to love someone. the 2nd is for someone to love you. and the 3rd is for the 1st and 2nd to happen at the same time.;)

bouie
07.07.25, 12:49 PM
One question, who would you rather choose: taong mahal mo pero di ka mahal o taong mahal ka pero di mo mahal? And why?

Preference ko yung taong mahal ako kasi ang kulang na lang sa equation ako na lang ang mahulog. :nice:

michaela
07.07.25, 02:34 PM
I've broken a heart; I've been inspired, I've inspired others, and I've learned 3 important things.

1st, you know a love is good for you if it makes you a better person, and if it brings closer to God.

2nd, you know a love is good for you if your family and friends are happy for you and your partner. Yes, I've tried the you-and-me-against-the-world thing, and it does feel wonderful experience a love that great. But in the end, you realize that your family and friends just want the best for you - they're not making you kontra. They love you , and they want you to have the love you deserve.

3rd, you know a love is good for you if you are able to "leave something for yourself". It is good to love with all your heart; it is good to be generous and giving to the one you love, but it's different when that love becomes the sole center of your life. Don't let your relationship/love consume you, because if anything should go wrong, you'll be losing end.


Let your love for your partner make you love yourself, others, and God even more.:)

jose
07.07.26, 12:07 PM
i agree very much, michaela, on these three things that you've learned. though if i may add on number 2...

i don't intend to disagree on your stand about the you-and-me-against-the-world thing but i believe it is relative. i have been in this kind of relationship, one that endured hardships, pain, humiliation and in-my-face verbal assaults (no exaggeration). her family (her clan actually) and friends slaughtered my personality and confidence just so she would leave me... because to them, i was just an ordinary guy struggling within and without... because they believe that this other guy whom she left for me would be better for her... because they believe that there are still others out there who would be better for her. she gave up once thinking that they were right. i let her go but told her i will wait no matter how long. i wanted to prove her family wrong... well guess what, after several years of struggle, i won. and eventually they loved me and respected me. i guess i am the "partner" in this quote of yours:
Let your love for your partner make you love yourself, others, and God even more.

what i'm trying to say is, love to the fullest but be cautious enough so as not to lose yourself. and if you believe you're right, and could stand up for it, then don't let anyone bring you down, no matter what. others, yes they love you, but they don't know you so well that they could always decide what's best for you and for your happiness. besides, God is with you always so i think you know what i mean ;).

cheers :)

btw, about that other guy, well... let me just say they found out for themselves that they were wrong about him, in a lot of ways...

diane
07.07.27, 06:06 AM
i agree very much, michaela, on these three things that you've learned. though if i may add on number 2...

i don't intend to disagree on your stand about the you-and-me-against-the-world thing but i believe it is relative. i have been in this kind of relationship, one that endured hardships, pain, humiliation and in-my-face verbal assaults (no exaggeration). her family (her clan actually) and friends slaughtered my personality and confidence just so she would leave me... because to them, i was just an ordinary guy struggling within and without... because they believe that this other guy whom she left for me would be better for her... because they believe that there are still others out there who would be better for her. she gave up once thinking that they were right. i let her go but told her i will wait no matter how long. i wanted to prove her family wrong... well guess what, after several years of struggle, i won. and eventually they loved me and respected me. i guess i am the "partner" in this quote of yours:


what i'm trying to say is, love to the fullest but be cautious enough so as not to lose yourself. and if you believe you're right, and could stand up for it, then don't let anyone bring you down, no matter what. others, yes they love you, but they don't know you so well that they could always decide what's best for you and for your happiness. besides, God is with you always so i think you know what i mean ;).

cheers :)

btw, about that other guy, well... let me just say they found out for themselves that they were wrong about him, in a lot of ways...


what a nice story jose, thanks for sharing...very inspirational....i am just glad you knew. that it was the LOVE worth waiting and fighting more..

i have bad instincts e...that i have proven.

jose
07.07.27, 10:57 AM
thanks diane. actually i'm glad i didn't make the wrong choice, hehe...

diane
07.07.31, 02:37 AM
thanks diane. actually i'm glad i didn't make the wrong choice, hehe...

its all a risk..you dont know if it was right or wrong at that time.... time will tell. i am glad too, your choice was the right one! GOd is good..

jose
07.08.10, 03:15 PM
i recently have witnessed an affair (the lady cheated) coming to an end, or so we hope. baka may magtanong ulit, hindi ko po ito love story, hehe... i was just one of the mediators of the couple. as i was contemplating on the string of events, i came to look at the scenario from a different angle. what if she loves them both? then i had this thought in my mind: ruling out flaws and mistakes, could a person be capable of genuinely loving/being in love with more than one person* at a time? ano sa palagay nyo?

*narrowing the subject to romantic love

yuanbautista
07.08.11, 08:24 AM
Sino kaya magtatanong sa yo ulit, Kuya Jose? :)

Parang 'Torn Between Two Lovers' ba ang dating?


There are times when a woman has to say what's on her mind
Even though she knows how much it's gonna hurt
Before I say another word, let me tell you "I love you"
Let me hold you close, and say these words as gently as I can
"There's been another man that I've needed and I've loved,
But that doesn't mean I love you less,
And he knows he can't possess me, and he knows he never will,
There's just this empty place inside of me that only he can fill"

You mustn't think you failed me just because there's someone else
You were the first real love I ever had,
And all the things I ever said
I swear they still are true
For no one else can have the part of me I gave to you

jose
07.08.13, 10:50 AM
sino kaya yuan? hehe... :)

yah, parang torn between two lovers. o kaya parang:

Maybe I hang around here
A little more than I should
We both know I got somewhere else to go
But I got something to tell you
That I never thought I would
But I believe you really ought to know

I love you
I honestly love you

You don't have to answer
I see it in your eyes
Maybe it was better left unsaid
This is pure and simple
And you should realize
That it's coming from my heart and not my head

I'm not trying to make you feel uncomfortable
I'm not trying to make you anything at all
But this feeling doesn't come along everyday
And you shouldn't blow the chance
When you've got the chance to say

If we both were born
In another place and time
This moment might be ending in a kiss
But there you are with yours
And here I am with mine
So I guess we'll just be leaving it at this

tsk! tsk! is it just the norm? is it just the 'rule'? or should it be really just like that?

titopao
07.08.17, 10:14 AM
Eto naman, mejo gloomy na question. I won't tell if it has something to do with my personal situation, but all the same I'd like to know what's on your mind.

How would you know if it's over? As in, talagang wala nang patutunguhan yung ugnayan ninyong dalawa? The premise is, hindi pa niya alam, pero sa part mo parang dumating na sa point na naiisip mo na awla nang mangyayari sa inyong dalawa, na talagang panahon na upang mag-move on....

herald
07.08.18, 09:51 AM
sali nga ako.. he he he...

I agree with kateri... pag in love ka may tendency to fall out of love...

Sa question ni Jose...how do you differentiate "love" from "being in love"? (i.e. i love you; i am in love with you) so, if somebody tells you "i think i love you but i'm not in love with you", how would you make that person feel otherwise?

mahirap mag speculate, but this is my opinion... your friend like her but he doesn't want to have a commitment yet.. "wait ka lang, hintayin mo ako, darating tayo sa serious relationship"... there must be a reason though...

or most likely, ganito .. i love you as a friend...

sorry hindi pala ito yung latest na pinaguusapan, di ko nabasa

yuanbautista
07.08.18, 11:40 AM
Eto naman, mejo gloomy na question. I won't tell if it has something to do with my personal situation, but all the same I'd like to know what's on your mind.

How would you know if it's over? As in, talagang wala nang patutunguhan yung ugnayan ninyong dalawa? The premise is, hindi pa niya alam, pero sa part mo parang dumating na sa point na naiisip mo na awla nang mangyayari sa inyong dalawa, na talagang panahon na upang mag-move on....

Siguro kung hindi ka na masaya sa kanya... hindi mo na siya masyadong naiisip o namimiss man lang.. kung sa tuwing magyayaya siyang lumabas, napipilitan ka na lang sumama.... you don't make the first moves para tumawag o makipag-chat. if you do naman, medyo parang wala ng effort. Sawa ka na sa usapan nyo. Parang katulad na lang ng dati ang topics. In short, bored ka na sa kanya. Mahirap na ngang ituloy yung ganung relasyon.

herald
07.08.20, 11:10 AM
how would you know that it is over??... Assessment is the key, for the time being na magkarelasyon kayo, ask this questions, are you growing as a person? (Spiritualy, emotionaly, etc.), are you looking forward to be with her/him for the rest of your life?, and masaya ka pa ba kapag kasama mo sya o maiisip man lang s'ya (as yuan said)? and many other questions but ito yng 3 basic questions na nakikita ko. If you are answers are no, then there's no reason anymore to go on with the relationship, Assessment should be done regularly. if isa lang doon eh may yes ka, then both of you have to talk to fix things kung may kailangan bang ayusin o kailangan na nga bang tapusin ang relasyon. ANd if you think it's over.. he/she have the right to know that it's over. the longer it take to tell it, the more it is painful.

jose
07.08.20, 12:19 PM
nasabi na ni yuan and herald most of the points that i could also think of in terms of a one sided feeling. pero para sa kin, i wouldn't know if it's really over unless we both talk about it. since a relationship is a two-way thing, what i feel might just be a plateau in our relationship. baka meron lang mga pagkukulang from both sides kaya nawawala na yung spark. but for me relationships aren't only based on "sparks" kaya normal lang na maging stagnant ang relationship for sometime. so it would really help if my girl and i would talk about it, try something new, go some place new...if all else fails, then it really is over.

i mean i would try to save my relationship first if i truly loved the girl.

gwen
07.08.24, 11:38 AM
do we really need to fall deeply in love????????

herald
07.08.24, 12:17 PM
iba iba gwen eh... how deep is your love... he he he... kanta yun ah, well it's case to case basis, basta when you fall in love dapat hindi yung deeply in love na... kahit ano ibibigay mo or kahit nasasaktan ka na nya, ok lang sa iyo, kasy deeply in love ka, mas ok kung yung sence na you are deeply in love pero hindi nawawala yung respect mo sa sarili, hindi ka nagmumukhang kaawa awa, in short masaya ka dahil nagmamahal ka at minamahal ka in return and you grow as a person, etc. etc...

jose
07.08.24, 05:49 PM
actually gwen, we don't really need to fall in love deeply, but we, or some of us, may want to fall in love deeply. why? because sometimes it feels good. sometimes it brings nothing but joy. sometimes it boosts confidence. sometimes it's all that matters. but beware cause sometimes (or most of the time) too, it could damage a person.

yuanbautista
07.08.24, 08:18 PM
Share ko lang....:)


Of course you've heard of Joe D'Mango. He gives advice on love and
relationships on Wave 89.1 ( Philippines ). Have you ever wondered what he
does when he has his own love problems? Does he give advice to himself?
Does he handle it very well?

Three fridays ago, our guru on relationships, Joe D'Mango, read a letter
to his wife on his popular radio program Love Notes. For the past 11
years, he had been giving advice to people who would write him letters
about their personal problems. To the surprise of his listeners that
Friday, instead of reading one of his usual letters, he read one that he
had written himself to his wife Bing. Joe felt that he had to tell his
listeners that even someone like him could go through a marital crisis, but
that he survived it. Here's how his letter goes:


> In our 11 years of marriage it was just the two of us. I never had a
> close circle of friends and she never had one either. Life for us was
> just "you and me," day in and day out. We were literally sleeping
> beside each other for 11 years. It came to a point that there was nothing
> more interesting to talk about. I was aware I was doing that but I never
> did anything about it. We were so close yet it seemed like we were so
> distant. Then came her new circle of friends.
>
> They recently had an elementary and high school reunion. Remember her
> persistent suitor since elementary days? He was there. We already had
> four daughters and the guy had four kids of his own. They exchanged
> phone numbers. They started to text each other and this bothered me. A big
> part of it was insecurity and other part was that she once denied that
> she was texting the guy.
>
> I felt bad because she started hiding things from me. Then the guy
> asked her if they could meet for lunch. It became a source of tension
> between us. I finally agreed, but before that, I told her that I felt that
> I was going through the same pain again. I have seen so many stories
> like this. If you told me the first part of the story, I would already
> know where it would lead to.
>
> Bing accused me of being a "know-it-all" person. But deep in my heart,
> I knew where she was heading. Why would a married guy see a married
> girl unless it was for business or professional reasons? Finally, even if
> it was against my will, I drove her to the meeting place.
>
> While I was waiting at the radio station, I wanted to call her but
> knew it wasn't proper. So I just waited for her to tell me how their
> meeting went.
>
> When she related to me what happened I felt that she was keeping the
> other details. I was afraid to ask because I wasn't prepared to accept
> her answers. I told her that it would be best if that was their last
> meeting. She got mad and told me that I was starting to control her life.
>
> The following day, I saw a small, torn piece of paper that had the
> words, "lose you" in the trash can at home. I started picking up the
> pieces of paper and putting them together. She had written: "Felt sad
> because I felt that this will be our last meeting." "Wanted to hug
> you..."
> Before I could figure out what the third one was, Bing was already at
> my back. She wanted to get the torn pieces of paper back. She said it
> was private property. We decided to talk.
>
> By then, I was able to figure out the third line: "Not sure if afraid
> to lose you." She had crossed it out and beside it, she had written,
> "Wanted to cry."
>
> That was what hit me. How could you lose something that's not even
> with you yet? That was a confirmation that she was getting emotionally
> attached to the guy. We fought because she didn't want to admit it. She
> said that what she had written was all about friendship and not about
> love. For the first time in our marriage she asked for freedom from me.
> For 11 years we were always together, and now this.
>
> She had discovered her own little world and wanted to explore it. I
> didn't want to give it to her but finally I gave in. I told her that she
> could do anything she wanted and not worry about how I would feel. In
> fact, I told her that I was planning to leave her and kids for a while
> so we could give each other the chance to be alone. We decided to give
> the new arrangement a try.
>
> The following day, Thursday, I went to work early and she texted me. I
> never answered back. When I didn't respond, she called me. She said,
> "I'm sorry. I love you and I miss you." For the first time in our
> mariage I said, "I love you and I miss you too" with tears in my eyes.
>
> I realized how much I loved her but I also knew how much she wanted
> her freedom. When I arrived at the station I asked for a leave. My boss
> advised me to think it over, but he said that he would allow me to go on
> leave. After letting it all out I felt relieved. It was the first time
> in my life that I asked for advice about our relationship.
>
> While I was talking with my boss, a messenger arrived with 12 white
> roses arranged in a basket. It came from Bing. Then a text message on my
> cellphone came, "I know that no material things can ease the pain that
> you're feeling right now, but these flowers signify my pure and sincere
> intentions. I'm really sorry. Please forgive me."
>
> Still, a question continued to bug me: "I'm giving you the freedom.
> Will you choose to stay or go on?" I read the card, and it had the
> answer to my question: "Dear Dad, I finally realized that I made a very big
> mistake in choosing a new-found friendship at the expense of our
> long-time friendship. Please forgive me. I wil always love you."
>
> Bing called the guy and told him that she wanted to end the
> friendship. He said that they could just text or call each other. Bing said
> that there was no need.
>
> We had dinner and talked up to 1 am. It was like getting married all
> over again. We lost each other and found our way back. I do not want to
> go through the same pain again.
>
> Friday came and it was the first time in the history of Love Notes
> that I couldn't do Love Notes. I scheduled a replay. When I was at the
> station at 9 am, I composed a letter to Bing. I was asking myself,
> should I read this or do a replay? I chose to read the letter. It is not
> unusual to hear people say "I love you because...," but this story has
> shown us that the deeper and greater love is having to say "I LOVE YOU
> IN SPITE OF..."



What hurts most?
....when you can't fight for that one thing that would make you happy...
....I may never be the guy you look forward to seeing every day...
....but I will always be the guy who will look out for you each and everyday...

Sad Girl: "don't make me feel that i'm just a selfish jerk just because I made you cry"!
Sad Guy: "then don't make me feel like I did nothing for you when I almost
died crying just to see you smile..."

Men are haunted by the vastness of eternity. And some ask ourselves:
Will our actions echo across the centuries?
Will strangers hear our names long after we are gone, and wonder who we
were, how bravely we fought, how fiercely we loved?

Love isn't when you can't sleep ... it's when you want to keep your eyes open...
Love isn't when you keep holding on ... it's when you learn to let go...
Love isn't when you kill yourself with jealousy ... it's when you understand
Love isnt' when you fall for someone ... it's when you catch that person when she falls...
Love isn't when you see her everywhere ... it's when you close your eyes and she is still there...
Love isn't when you tell her what you feel ... it's when you give everything for her sake...
And Love isn't when you think you were blind ... it's when you know he was wrong but you didn't mind!

diane
07.08.25, 12:46 AM
ang ganda naman nung letter ni Joe D'M...thanks for sharing yuan!

titopao
07.08.25, 09:05 PM
I lost my copy of this particular letter, but I do remember having had read this reprinted in Inquirer Libre a few years back. I'd have to admit that this is one of the best letters ever published by Joe d'Mango :)

jose
07.08.27, 11:04 AM
yeah, i agree...very nice. very nice...

yuanbautista
07.08.31, 08:02 PM
This is Love?

When you think of your past love, you
may view it as a failure. But when you
find a new love, you view the past as a
teacher. In the game of love, it
doesn't really matter who won or lost.
What is important is you know when to
hold on and when to let go. You know
you really love someone when you want
him to be happy, even if their
happiness means that you're not part of
it. Everything happens for the best. If
the person you love doesn't love you,
don't be afraid to love someone else
again for you'll never know unless you
give it a try. You'll never learn to
love a person unless you risk for love.

Love strives and hurt you. If you don't
get hurt, you don't learn how to love.
Love doesn't hurt all the time. Though
the hurting is still there to test you,
helping you grow.

Don't find love, let love find you.
That's why it's called falling in love,
because you don't force yourself to
fall --- you just fall.

You cannot finish a book without
closing its chapters. If you want to go
on, then you have to leave the past as
you turn the pages.

Love is not destroyed by a single
failure or won by a single caress. It
is a lifetime venture in which we are
always learning, discovering and
growing. The greatest irony of love is
letting go when you need to hold on and
holding on when you need to let go. We
lose someone we love only when we are
destined to find someone else who can
love us even more than we can love
ourselves.

On falling out of love, take some time
to heal and then go back to the horse.
But don't ever make the mistake of
riding the same one that threw you the
first time.

To love is to risk rejection, to live
is to risk dying. To hope is to risk
failure, to reach for another is to
risk involvement. To expose your
feelings is to expose your true self
and to love is to risk not to be loved
in return. But risk must be taken
because the greatest hazard in life is
to risk nothing!

How to define love: fall but do not
stumble, be constant but not too
persistent, share but never be unfair,
understand and try not to demand, hurt
but never keep the pain.

Love is like a knife. It can stab the
heart or it can carve wonderful images
into the soul that always last for a
lifetime.

Love is supposed to be the most
wonderful feeling. It should inspire
you and give you joy and strength. But
sometimes the things that give you joy
also hurt you in the end.

Loving people means giving them the
freedom to choose who they want to be
and where they choose to be. For all
the heartaches and tears, for the
gloomy days and fruitless years, you
should give thanks for knowing that
there were things that helped you grow.
Loving someone means giving him the
freedom to find his way, whether it
leads toward you or away from you.

Love is a painful risk to take but the
risk must be taken no matter what, how
scary or painful, for only then you'll
experience the fullness of humanity and
that is love. Only love can hurt you
heart, fill you with desire and tear
you apart. Only love can make you cry
and only love knows why. If you're not
ready to cry, if you're not ready to
take the risk, if you're not ready to
feel the pain, then you're not ready to
fall in love. There was a time in our
lives when we become afraid to fall in
love, cause every time we do, we get
hurt and it takes time to mend the
heart. When you decide to love, allow
it to grow and when you promised to
love, never let it die.

You know, I am once confused about
love, but then after some time, I
realized the real meaning of love and
now I can say that it is really a very
mysterious thing. You see, if you find
yourself in love with someone who does
not love you, be gentle to yourself.
There is nothing wrong with you; love
just didn't choose to rest in the other.

royal haggardness
07.09.18, 08:05 AM
Yuan,

Such an inspiring message. Just what I needed. :)

I just want to share this with all of you... (I also have this in one of my personal blogs.)

A very close girl friend of mine (“Thanks Karen!” - a.k.a. K-Yu) sent me this through email. This was maybe because I had asked her and my other friends and family for prayers after I have heard from HIM the WHOLE TRUTH (I think the last time we talked to each other after the break-up was 20 days ago).

This article was written by IVAN BRIAN (I don’t know him, by the way). He dedicated this to a shattered-into-pieces-broken hearted friend (I won’t mention the name anymore) who recently was left by his girlfriend after 6 long years of relationship. This was written on a Good Friday, April 6, 2007.

To IVAN BRIAN: “Thank you for writing this for your friend. As I read through each line, this is exactly what I wanted to say after speaking with him. Thanks for making my life easier.” P.S. I just need to modify the personal pronouns you have used so that it would sound right for my situation.

To ALL OF YOU out there: “I want to share this with you.”

Ever heard of falling out of love? Probably not… mainly because we are always accustomed of the phrase “falling in love”. And I think we are afraid of this one, falling out love. But is there such a case that we fall out of love? I am tempted to say yes. Because someone once did and maybe somebody out there might have experienced the same thing. He fell out of love in the same way that he fell in love. It’s almost the same. The difference only lies on the situation that the process is in a fed up stage, “this relationship has lost its spark”, “we should move on with our lives separately”, “the relationship has not been healthy” and so on.

I was there fighting for the love I fought for many years and invested so much time and effort just to make the relationship grow and saw the future spent together with that special someone. I uttered words of affections and sincerity all those years. Actions have been enough for me to show how important that person is for me. Time is only running because of him. My whole world is not my world anymore but he is the world itself. That special someone has been THE “everything” in my primordial existence… the breath of my breath and the reason of all reasons.

But the end has come. The “center of my world” fell out love or in a much simpler term “he doesn’t love me anymore” and has decided to move on with life with out my presence. I suddenly become uninvited. That person I adore and love for a long time has come to a decision that we should separate our ways. He thought that both of us are better of separated. He has fallen out of love. The feeling is gone. The spark has lost its flame and the clarity of the future slowly became blurred then suddenly faded away. My world suddenly stopped revolving and out of the blue I became deaf and speechless; basically the person who meant everything for me is now gone.

He fell out of love. That’s it. Enough for explanations.

It is an uncontrollable situation. Nobody ever dreamt of that instance when our loved one… our “everything” distanced himself from us. It is not easy. All those years I breathe and eat and smile and laugh and cry and live everyday with him. But now he’s gone. The “raison d’ etre” of my existence has vanished into thin air.

My everyday heaven and ecstasy has become a hell and a nightmare. It is as if I wish that I am dead or maybe even thought that why the hell he came into my life and eventually left me for no reason at all.

What have I done wrong? Is the love I un-egoistically gave became insufficient that is why he decided to “fall out of love” and leave me in the middle of nowhere? I cannot stop blaming myself. Is it my fault? Am I incompetent enough to deserve someone like you? If not, why do you have to leave me wondering what’s wrong with me or what’s wrong with the situation.

I cannot stop blaming myself because I am the left-alone here. Things became so easy for you that you just woke up one day that you do not love me anymore. It’s unfair and I deserve some answers to all my queries for everything will just be hanging on my head until I became crazy and feel insane.

But if your reason is that you fell out of love, out of the love that I unselfishly offered you with my whole life, I will understand and try to comprehend and even decipher every little word of that phrase “you fell out of love” even if it takes me a month or a year or so just to realize and grasp the meaning of your statement. Maybe until then I will be numb and when the time comes that I feel the same feeling you have right now, that is the time I will stop and will fully understand the statement that turned my life in three-hundred and sixty degrees in perpendicular angle. I will soon crack the codes behind that transparent testimony you said after that very long years of our relationship.

For the heart has a reason that the very reason cannot know itself.

And now, I have to move on with my life, slowly and slowly because the things and memories of our beautiful past keep haunting me every day of my life. My moving on will be a snail track because I was used to be with you every minute of my survival. It will not be an easy one for you have became my life, my whole damn life has made you its epicenter and the shockwave you caused when you decided to leave me in the desert of this life has shattered every foundation I have for me to keep existing. It will not be easy but I will one day live again until such a time that waking up is just another ordinary day and the memories you left behind will just be simple memories of past that taught me how to be strong and to survive. It only shows that I am a person who was and is able to give true love to a special someone who deserves this kind of love.

I will be strong for myself because someone out there might be waiting for me, someone to love me back unselfishly and someone so deserving of the love you have thrown.

One day I will move on and will give a sweet smile every time I remember the day you said “I fell out of love.”

I don't know if this fits this thread but as I have said, I just want to share this with you. :)

Truly, "loving people means giving them the freedom to choose who they want to be and where they choose to be."

jose
07.09.18, 11:19 AM
thanks for sharing abi.

this one's the killer: (To)day I will move on and will give a sweet smile every time I remember the day you said “I fell out of love.”

royal haggardness
07.09.19, 03:33 AM
You're welcome po. :)

Yes, one day, I think I'll be able to utter those words. In God's time...

deathkill00008
08.01.14, 09:19 PM
pwede bang magbgay kayo ng advice sa mga loveless katulad ko

titopao
08.01.14, 09:48 PM
pwede bang magbgay kayo ng advice sa mga loveless katulad ko

Well...what kind of advice do you need? ;)

And if you don't mind me asking, what's your current situation? Mahirap magbigay ng advice kung hindi klaro ang problema/isyu, right? :)

Chengwich
08.01.15, 12:16 PM
tamang tama, malapit na ang valentines. .... :heart::love:

deathkill00008
08.01.17, 07:49 PM
parang pag pinag uusapan kasi yung love... lage akong na oOP.
Kasi sa dati kong sitwasyon, na inlove na ako... pero, tulad ng sa iba, naging bato, hanggang sa magustuhan ko na nga itong mundo ng musika at tila ba naging bato na ako... indi na ako nagmahal ulet. ayun.

indi naman siya problema, tama po ba?
kasi bata pa naman po ako at alam ko naman po na da rating din yang pagmamahal sa takdang panahon...

siguro, ten rebirths hahaha.

(pero minsan nakakaiggit tignan yung mga magkasintahan, kaya pag ganun... kinakantahan ko nalang and ginagawa kong busy ang sarili ko... para ma forget ko na yun)

titopao
08.01.18, 12:21 AM
parang pag pinag uusapan kasi yung love... lage akong na oOP.
Kasi sa dati kong sitwasyon, na inlove na ako... pero, tulad ng sa iba, naging bato, hanggang sa magustuhan ko na nga itong mundo ng musika at tila ba naging bato na ako... indi na ako nagmahal ulet. ayun.

indi naman siya problema, tama po ba?
kasi bata pa naman po ako at alam ko naman po na da rating din yang pagmamahal sa takdang panahon...

siguro, ten rebirths hahaha.

(pero minsan nakakaiggit tignan yung mga magkasintahan, kaya pag ganun... kinakantahan ko nalang and ginagawa kong busy ang sarili ko... para ma forget ko na yun)

LOL Sabi ko na nga ba ;)

I would advise not to think too much about it. In fact, I would even say, be happy for those lovers that you see. And keep on hoping...love will come to you when you don't expect it.

As for confidence, I've learned that the more you become conscious about it, the more it would make you look insecure. So you might as well don't make a big deal out of it, your time will come, eventually. Just be patient, and you will get there in time. Kung talagang will ni Lord na ipagtagpo ka sa talagang para sa iyo, mangyayari iyon. Magtiwala ka lang :)

If you ask me about my current situation: I'm currently single (and, para klaro, I'm a few years shy of being 30). As for any current relationships...ayoko munang i-disclose kasi mejo sensitive, but for all practical purposes you can consider me available (in case may gusto kang i-reto sa akin na mejo chinita, chinita addict ako eh ;) ;) ). Some of my high school classmates are doing good in their relationships, while others have already married (one of my former classmates was married last December to his girlfriend of a few years ata). As in, kung pag-iisipan kong mabuti, paunti na ng paunti yung mga still-single sa batch namin, baka mapag-iwanan na rin ako (or kaming mga singles).

Ngunit, subalit, datapwa't...hindi ko ito itinuring na isang hadlang o suliranin. Para sa akin, tuloy lang ang buhay ko, ine-enjoy ko lang at hindi ko na iniinda yung mga pasaring ng ibang tao na bakit hanggang ngayon ay di pa raw ako nag-aasawa. Kung minsan pa nga, kung kailan ko pa "napapabayaan/pinababayaan" ang love life ko ay dun pa dumarating yung opportunities para may mga makilala akong mga bagong mukha. (At, kung minsan pa nga, dun ko pa natatagpuang ang pag-ibig ;) ). Don't rush into love, mas masarap yung talagang pinagsikapan mo ng husto. And pag dumating yung chance mo, alagaan mong mabuti sa abot ng iyong makakaya, huwag mong sasaktan o iiwan yung mamahalin mo.

In short...huwag mong masyadong intindihin yung pagiging single mo, and mas lalong wag kang maiinggit sa mga magkasintahan na nakikita mo. Be happy for them in such that they have found love, and in such that it's something you are aspiring for in the near future. Love is good, so don't be envious of other people who have found this goodness (sana nga lang, sa mas mahaba pang panahon ;) ) And pray hard that one day your prayers will be granted and you will have the chance to experience love in your own time...in His time. In the meantime, enjoy your life as it is. Don't let your singleness stop you from enjoying your life. Malay mo, isang araw, biglang dumating yung chance mo nang hindi mo namamalayan LOL

titopao
08.01.18, 12:28 AM
Habol ko lang since nabanggit mong ini-immerse mo ang sarili mo sa pagkanta:

Take it from me, paghusayin mo ang pagkanta mo and be very, very serious about it. Ewan ko kung gaano katotoo ito, pero karamihan ng mga girls na kilala ko, hinahanap nila sa mga lalaki ay yung magaling kumanta or maganda ang boses sa pagkanta. Meron naman, hinahanap yung marunong (or, even better, magaling) tumugtog ng piano or guitar. So make the most of it, baka ito na yung "secret weapon" mo na sakaling makatulong in the future :)

Just that, wag mo masyadong i-advertise itong competitive edge mo sa ibang tao. kaya nga siya "secret weapon", right? ;)

chopinsky
08.01.18, 01:38 AM
marami bang loveless dito like me.. and broken-hearted? pag love topic, ganda pag-usapan yan... anyway, thanks yuanbautista and royal haggardness for that beautiful sharing about love.. very nice! natamaan ako! huhuhuhu....:)

royal haggardness
08.01.18, 02:21 PM
you're welcome chopinsky! :)

deathkill00008
08.01.18, 10:29 PM
thanks kuya pao. ok lang kahit na siguro maging loveless panghabang buhay if will yun ni God.

thanks po sa advice

di na ko maiingit pa

haha

blueforgetmenot
08.01.19, 12:42 AM
weee valentines na nga, i'm not loveless yun lang di kami magkasama... huhuhuhu
hi deathkill.. nakarelate ako sayo, minsan din kasi naging bato ang puso ko at sa musika nahumaling, sabi pa nga nila even my family baka maging matandang dalaga na ako,,, hehehe im so head over heel inlove with someone kaso kabaliktaran yung pinaramdam nya sakin eh, first love ko pa naman sya, sya din ang main reason why i developed this fine hands of mine to play piano.. halos sabay kasi kami nun nag-aral eh, almost 6 years ako baliw sa kanya kahit nagkakaron ako ng boyfrend sya talaga gusto ko ehhhh :00, tas after nun bato nalang din ang puso ko kasi nasaktan ako ng sobra,kahit madami nanliligaw sakin, (madalas nagugustuhan nila ako kasi nagpapiano ako) eh nirereject ko, kasi gusto ko hangaan nila ako kasi kung ano ako sa personality ko, hindi dahil gusto lang nila ako kasi nakikita nila tumutugtog sa simbahan o saan mang okasyon,(panu kasi pag di na ako tumutugtog, di na rin nila ako gusto?)

minsan nga lang mahirap talaga maghanap na eksakto sa gusto mo but what i experienced was so amazing,

wala naman ako standards sa isang lalake, isa lang.. hehehe basta yun lang naman eh, yung tatanggapin ako sa kung ako buhay na meron ako..

may binigay naman SIYA eh, sa nakakatuwang paraan pa nga eh,di ko inaasahan..
hehehehe obvious ba hanggang ngayon natutuwa pa rin ako hehehehehe

i met my man sa chatroom lang, di inaasahang magkapitbahay lang pala kami, at dati syang choir member ng isa sa mga youth choir samin,, we have a lot of common friends pala,kaya lage kami kwnetuhan pero matagal bago kami nagmeet, dahilan namin wala kami time, sa kabilang subdivision lang sya nyan ah.. nagmeet kami bago na sya umalis pasakay ng barko..pagbalik nya kami na,hehehe
di namn ako nagsisisi kasi sobrang naguumapaw na blessing sya sakin, nagustuhan nya ako dahil magaling ako gumawa ng kalokohan na napapatawa ko sya lage, alam nya tumutugtog ako ng piano sa simbahan, tanggap nya na priority ko as much as posible ay ang service ko sa church above all things i do.. yun kasi ang issue sa mga boypren ko di tumagal eh, (at wala naman kasi talaga tumagal eh, matagal na nga yung kalahating taon eh), hindi nya sinabi yun kundi talagang sya pa ang nagpapaalala sa akin at worried pag di ko nagagawa yung pagseserve ko sa church, sya lang ang taong nakaintindi sakin, na di ako pinagtatawanan, na di ako inaasar na magmamadre o banal.. yun ung nagiisang standard ko, meron pa pala! last na to... on how he value his family.. i believe pag ang lalake may concern at may pagpapahalaga sa pamilya nya, hindi na ako dapat mangamba sa pamilyang mabubuo namin balang araw.... ayun wala na talaga.. mahirap lang minsan kasi long distance relationship pero sabi ko sakanya, eto ay isa sa mga trials namin, na dapat malagpasan namin kung gusto talaga namin na kami magkasama hanggang sa hanggang kailan..

kaya deathkill.. wag ka mamroblema na loveless ka kasi mas maraming problema kung attached ka na sa isang tao pero masaya.. pero mas masaya kung advise ko lang sayo, you enjoy life being a single man muna, tingin ko di naman forever single ka kasi kung mamahalin lang, hiling ka lang kay god.. im sure bibigyan ka nun ng mas higit pa sa gusto mo..tas bigla nalang dadating yan at kung choice mo na rin naman, yun lang wag ka manhid kasi madalas katabi mo na pala.. ahehehe ayun nastick ka nalang tuloy na loveless.. at chaka eto last na.. wala na yun nalang

natuwa lang ako magshare.. ahehehehehehe

godbless guys!
hope you enjoy this coming valentines day romantically and full of love!
sa mga single(yes nakakinggit.. kaso ganun talaga eh.. ganito lang pag tinanong kayo, "i'm single because of my choice and not by fate"? ahehehe?

ayyy tapos na talaga to.. eto na PERIOD.

royal haggardness
08.01.19, 07:35 AM
sa mga single(yes nakakinggit.. kaso ganun talaga eh.. ganito lang pag tinanong kayo, "i'm single because of my choice and not by fate"? ahehehe?
ayyy tapos na talaga to.. eto na PERIOD.

Hi Sallie (blueforgetmenot),

How are you? Hope you still remember me. Nice sharing ha... effort kung effort. :) That only means you're really happy and proud of what you have right now.

With regard dun sa phrase I quoted, this is what I always say when I'm being asked about being single... "I like being single because I'm always there when I needed me." :)

For those who are currently in love, stay in love!

Lots of love,
Royal Haggardness

Cinderella
08.01.19, 02:12 PM
Just remember, everyone of us have its own love story all we have to do is wait for the right time for it to be publish because our writer might looking for the best love story for us.

blueforgetmenot
08.01.19, 11:43 PM
Hi Sallie (blueforgetmenot),

How are you? Hope you still remember me. Nice sharing ha... effort kung effort. :) That only means you're really happy and proud of what you have right now.

With regard dun sa phrase I quoted, this is what I always say when I'm being asked about being single... "I like being single because I'm always there when I needed me." :)

For those who are currently in love, stay in love!

Lots of love,
Royal Haggardness


HI ATE ABBY.. DI BA YUN NAME mo ate royal? opo i still remember you ganda mo po kaya noh hehehe nagulat ako ang haba pala nun hehehe ang kulet naman ng sagot mo, sabagay kaya nga single ahehehe :):):)

ryanestandarte
08.01.20, 01:44 AM
Actually, ang hirap na situwasyon ang pagiging "inlablau". Pero masarap pa rin itong pag-usapan minsan.

Since nasa love naman tayo, here's my question:

Would it be possible to think na the reason you can't be with someone that you really, really, really, really love is that you're not yet ready for that relationship with her, thus cirumstances are molding you to be together?

Labo ba? Heheheh!!! Epekto ng antok...and also missing someone...that someone that I used to love...

WAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! :(

titopao
08.01.21, 12:56 AM
I'll be quick and straight to the point (since kauuwi ko lang galing sa mga kamag-anak ko sa Dagupan, haggard na ako :P ):

Yes, it is possible. Ganun yung nangyari sa akin before. Pero, I don't want to generalize, iba kasi yung nangyari sa kin before (and it was more like yung girl ang "not ready" at the time). :)

royal haggardness
08.01.21, 09:52 AM
HI ATE ABBY.. DI BA YUN NAME mo ate royal? opo i still remember you ganda mo po kaya noh hehehe nagulat ako ang haba pala nun hehehe ang kulet naman ng sagot mo, sabagay kaya nga single ahehehe :):):)

Yes, Sallie, that's my name. :) At yes, makulit talaga yung sagot ko kasi makulit din ako, hahaha.

At para wag ma off-topic (hehehe), with or without a partner... everyone deserves to love and to be loved.

titopao
08.01.21, 10:32 AM
Since napag-uusapan na rin lang :) just a few thoughts that came off my head:

Don't ever think that you're "loveless" this coming Valentine's Day, whether that means you haven't found romantic love or you were brokenhearted in one way or another (whether nag-away kayo, iniwan ka or ipinagpalit ka sa iba). The truth is, you are loved even though you may not realize it. And when you think about it, you're not quite that "loveless" at all.

First, the mere fact that you're alive and reading this means that God loves you, and He gave you this life so that you can enjoy every moment of it and be able to share goodness and the joys of living to others. Be grateful that He gave you another day to live and, in return, repay His love by being kind and generous to other people, in spite of and no matter what happens, in spite of and regardless of how difficult life may seem.

Second, whether you realize it or not, your family is there to provide you support in every endeavour you take in your life. They have nourished you from your childhood until your present condition. Whenever you need some help, they are there willing to help you out. No matter what happens to you, your family will always be there. They may not be very vocal about it, but the truth is your family loves you.

Third, your friends have walked with you in those times that you felt lonely. They have been your support in those trying times and have given you a shoulder to cry on when you feel like you have nowhere to turn to. As the Bible quote goes, there is no greater love than for someone to lay down his life for a friend (and sometimes even give you their only pocket money when you really needed the cash ;) ). Your friends have loved you like a brother or sister, though they may not have to tell this to you.

Fourth, there is a greater world out there, and just when you think you had the most desperate situation in the world, there are some people whose burdens are even greater than yours. People who have never experienced even the love of a family. People who have been lonely without the company of even a friend. People who have seen the worst that may bring out the worst of a person, whether this means poverty, injustice or anything similar. There is so much misery in the world, but there is only much that we can do. So rather than wallow in the misery of being "loveless", think of all the people who need much, much more than love and compassion, and do your best to help and reach out to as much people as you can. Spread your love in your own little way.

Having said all of these, enjoy your life, live it to the best that you can, cherish the small precious moments that come your way and let each moment count...and one day you may find someone who turns out to share the same passions and joys that you have. When you do find that special someone, take good care of him/her and never let him/her go. God knows the deepest secrets of your heart, and He will show you the way even without you asking Him for it.

"Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

Stay happy :)

ryanestandarte
08.01.21, 11:20 AM
I'll be quick and straight to the point (since kauuwi ko lang galing sa mga kamag-anak ko sa Dagupan, haggard na ako :P ):

Yes, it is possible. Ganun yung nangyari sa akin before. Pero, I don't want to generalize, iba kasi yung nangyari sa kin before (and it was more like yung girl ang "not ready" at the time). :)

Pero here's one thing she said that I will never forget (pero sana makalimutan ko):

"I'm not interested in you romantically"....

(ouch! :( )

But it's possible na mabago ito di ba?

titopao
08.01.21, 11:54 AM
Pero here's one thing she said that I will never forget (pero sana makalimutan ko):

"I'm not interested in you romantically"....

(ouch! :( )

But it's possible na mabago ito di ba?

Hmmm...okay. I don't think yung situation ko might apply in your case, kasi in my case hindi rin ready yung girl nung una (can't disclose it here, sorry) pero, eventually, dun mismo sa girl nanggaling na gusto rin niya ako. And when I think about it, hindi ko rin naman siya niligawan talaga even though i do like her. (Sorry, hanggang dito na lang ang pwede kong sabihin, hope you understand :) )

"I'm not interested" may mean a whole lot of things which might also include the fact that she's already into another relationship (hindi sa sinasabi kong meron nga, ang sinasabi ko lang dito ay isa yon sa mga posibilidad), or she was burned in her last one, or...I don't know, baka lang siguro talagang hindi niya feel (or hindi pa niya ma-feel). To be fair with the girl, at least she told you where she stands, kesa naman sa paaasahin ka niya for years and then parang wala lang, parang pinaglaruan ka lang niya. At least, at this point, alam mo yung feelings niya for you, and to be honest with you I'd consider that a good thing.

Isang suggestion ko (among other possibilities)---I know this may be unacceptable---is to move on and get on with your life, and don't think too much about the apparent rejection. I'm not saying that one day she'll have that change of heart or that you should completely forget her and ignore her (at least, you should still try to be friendly with her), but at least take it in stride and don't dwell too much about it. Get on with your life, and who knows what may happen? Baka isang araw ma-realize niya what she might have been missing from you, based sa makikita niya sa iyo in the future. Or baka makakita ka ng isang babaeng mas mamahalin ka ng mas higit pa sa inaasahan mo. I'm not giving you any false hope here, but the thing is rejection is a normal thing and should not let you down. Let it not frustrate you.

Any suggestions from the others? :)

ryanestandarte
08.01.21, 12:48 PM
Isang suggestion ko (among other possibilities)---I know this may be unacceptable---is to move on and get on with your life, and don't think too much about the apparent rejection.
Any suggestions from the others? :)

I understand it and I fully accept that. I did that when I went to the US
and prayed to God that I'll let her go and getting off the ride (actually, dinalaw ko yung sister ko doon).

Pero what if circumstances are leading you back to her, though how hard you try of letting her go?

Hirap noh? ???

Btw, this is based on my experience.

Any suggestions din from others? :)

blueforgetmenot
08.01.21, 01:54 PM
Pero here's one thing she said that I will never forget (pero sana makalimutan ko):

"I'm not interested in you romantically"....

(ouch! :( )

But it's possible na mabago ito di ba?


sa tingin ko, posible naman, if she's not yet in any relationship.. sakin kasi (sakin lang ha?) if you really want her, go for it.. wala naman masama eh except kung sinabi nya na talaga sa'yo na tumigil ka na kasi ayaw ka talaga nya.. dalawa lang yan,first, accept it as a challenge...
yung she's not interested with you romantically, interested lang naman eh then make her interested about you.. think of ways..
ang babae kasi, di naman lahat pero madalas walang consistency eh, (pero kung ako ikaw lang yun ah? dati kasi ako lalake eh hehehe joke)..

pero ulet.. tulad din sa sinabi ni titopao, yung second, accept it as a rejection.. everybody is experiencing that in different ways.. kung ganun man, think it as always positive, lam ko lage sinasabi marami pa dian,(tru naman diba?) think again why naman? kasi kung maiintindihan mo kung bakit, madali ka makakamove on. (sakin lang ulet yun ah kung ako ikaw) ako kasi pag narereject ako, iniisip ko bakit, ahh siguro ganito, ahh kasi ganyan,ahh siguro dapat..lalo na pag matindi at masakit..

diba dalawa yun? yung una ang reward mo dun sa pagpursue mo (positive ka kasi diba) weee happy beginning

yung pangalawa,, sa pagtanggap mo ng pagreject sayo( positive ka nga kasi diba?) mas okay at mas magiging happy ka at mas magugustuhan mo yung kung ano man ang magyayari and walang bitterness in your heart.. or maybe the most unexpected thing in your entire life..

kung ako ikaw lang naman yan bro..

blueforgetmenot
08.01.21, 02:02 PM
Yes, Sallie, that's my name. :) At yes, makulit talaga yung sagot ko kasi makulit din ako, hahaha.

At para wag ma off-topic (hehehe), with or without a partner... everyone deserves to love and to be loved.

kaya maswerte ang prince mo someday kasi bihira sila makakahanap ng mga tulad nating makulet.. tayo ang mag-aad ng spice sa buhay nila.. ahehehehee

:))

ryanestandarte
08.01.21, 02:36 PM
sa tingin ko, posible naman, if she's not yet in any relationship.. sakin kasi (sakin lang ha?) if you really want her, go for it.. wala naman masama eh except kung sinabi nya na talaga sa'yo na tumigil ka na kasi ayaw ka talaga nya.. dalawa lang yan,first, accept it as a challenge...
yung she's not interested with you romantically, interested lang naman eh then make her interested about you.. think of ways..
ang babae kasi, di naman lahat pero madalas walang consistency eh, (pero kung ako ikaw lang yun ah? dati kasi ako lalake eh hehehe joke)..

pero ulet.. tulad din sa sinabi ni titopao, yung second, accept it as a rejection.. everybody is experiencing that in different ways.. kung ganun man, think it as always positive, lam ko lage sinasabi marami pa dian,(tru naman diba?) think again why naman? kasi kung maiintindihan mo kung bakit, madali ka makakamove on. (sakin lang ulet yun ah kung ako ikaw) ako kasi pag narereject ako, iniisip ko bakit, ahh siguro ganito, ahh kasi ganyan,ahh siguro dapat..lalo na pag matindi at masakit..

diba dalawa yun? yung una ang reward mo dun sa pagpursue mo (positive ka kasi diba) weee happy beginning

yung pangalawa,, sa pagtanggap mo ng pagreject sayo( positive ka nga kasi diba?) mas okay at mas magiging happy ka at mas magugustuhan mo yung kung ano man ang magyayari and walang bitterness in your heart.. or maybe the most unexpected thing in your entire life..

kung ako ikaw lang naman yan bro..

actually, i took it as a challenge before. 4 times ko siya niligawan, 4 times din nabasted. kaya lang ako kasi ang may kasalanan...dahil sa maling akala...

badtrip talaga ako...but i still have tiny feelings for her after that thing i said regarding someone-is-bringing-her-back-to-me.

oh well...

jose
08.01.21, 04:50 PM
napakagaganda naman ng mga insights na nababasa ko dito...

titopao
08.01.21, 05:02 PM
napakagaganda naman ng mga insights na nababasa ko dito...

Tenchu po :) And if you don't mind, kung meron ka pong maise-share na insights para kay ryanestandarte, I think he'll appreciate it :)

actually, i took it as a challenge before. 4 times ko siya niligawan, 4 times din nabasted. kaya lang ako kasi ang may kasalanan...dahil sa maling akala...

This actually raises some more questions for me (actually, dalawa lang naman :D )

1. Four times mo na palang niligawan, and still four times ka rin ni-reject. How long has this been going on?

2. Admittedly, mabigat 'tong isang question na ito: Gaano katagal kang maghihintay o magtitiis? Hanggang saan mo kakayanin 'yan?

Think hard before you answer this second question, because the question is easier than it sounds, pero masyading mabigat para sagutin, hindi ito biro-biro :)

blueforgetmenot
08.01.21, 07:46 PM
actually, i took it as a challenge before. 4 times ko siya niligawan, 4 times din nabasted. kaya lang ako kasi ang may kasalanan...dahil sa maling akala...


oh well...

tingin ko sa sinabi ko kanina, yun na yung pangalawa, kung nasasaktan ka lang palagi, okay yun, oo, sa mga martir(tawag daw yun sa mga nagmamanhid-manhidan).. kung sakin lang ulet at ulet ah? i would stop insisting myself to her, late ko na kasi nabasa na you cant let her go because something is leading you back to her.. kaya ang masasabi ko lang ...

wala na ang hirap kasi nga eh.. lalo na kung nakaksama mo pa, kung ako ikaw baka kaya ko, pero kasi ikaw yan eh, hehehe smile ka nalang para medyo makalimutan mo kahit 10% lang

blueforgetmenot
08.01.21, 07:53 PM
actually, i took it as a challenge before. 4 times ko siya niligawan, 4 times din nabasted. kaya lang ako kasi ang may kasalanan...dahil sa maling akala...


oh well...

tingin ko sa sinabi ko kanina, yun na yung pangalawa, kung nasasaktan ka lang palagi, okay yun, oo, sa mga martir(tawag daw yun sa mga nagmamanhid-manhidan).. kung sakin lang ulet at ulet ah? i would stop insisting myself to her, late ko na kasi nabasa na you cant let her go because something is leading you back to her.. kaya ang masasabi ko lang ...

wala na ang hirap kasi nga eh.. lalo na kung nakaksama mo pa, kung ako ikaw baka kaya ko, pero kasi ikaw yan eh, hehehe smile ka nalang para medyo makalimutan mo kahit 10% lang

deathkill00008
08.01.21, 08:50 PM
actually, mas lalo ako akong "dinadaga" sa mga naririnig kong break ups bout sa love...

ito rin siguro yung dahilan kung baket mhirap magmahal sa umpisa... (although alam ko na nararamdaman ko na siya) pinipilit ko sa sarili ko na hindi ako inlababo...

grabe yun apat na beses niligawan taz apat na beses ni reject... buhay ka pa nun? <aray ku po>

cguroh, mas mabuting magmahal nalang ng walang hinihintay... well, tsaka ang love naman, hindi lang naman pang magkasintahan eh, pwede rin sa family and diba?

yun nga lang, iba pa rin yung attention na naiibigay sayu nung tao pag "kayo" na...
iba sa trato ng friends...
iba rin sa trato ng family....

haaayyy.... siguroh bato bato muna ako....

blueforgetmenot, thanks sa sharing ha... kyut ng story, there is still enough reason para ma inlove... haha

<bata pa naman ako e, yun nga lang... lahat ng kasabayan ko naka experience na, ako nalang hindi>

<naalala ko tuloy yung kwento ng misis dun sa wowowee ata, magmamadre daw siya, di pa daw siya naiinvolve sa isang relasyon dati kaya ang pinagawa sa kanya ng mga madre, pina involve sa isang relasyon, matapos nun, di na bumalik sa pagiging madre... haha>

ryanestandarte
08.01.21, 11:35 PM
tingin ko sa sinabi ko kanina, yun na yung pangalawa, kung nasasaktan ka lang palagi, okay yun, oo, sa mga martir(tawag daw yun sa mga nagmamanhid-manhidan).. kung sakin lang ulet at ulet ah? i would stop insisting myself to her, late ko na kasi nabasa na you cant let her go because something is leading you back to her.. kaya ang masasabi ko lang ...

wala na ang hirap kasi nga eh.. lalo na kung nakaksama mo pa, kung ako ikaw baka kaya ko, pero kasi ikaw yan eh, hehehe smile ka nalang para medyo makalimutan mo kahit 10% lang

Correction po ate. I've let her go na when I prayed to God of helping me to let go. When I left the chapel, wala na akong nararamdaman. I was at peace.

However, it seems that someone is bringing her back to me. That's the irony of every thing. Why is it that when I finally let her go, someone's bringing her back again?

Tito Pao
2004 or 2005 pa iyon noong niligawan ko siya. Funny how things happened since then. I'm not waiting for her because I'm happy with what I am doing.

But here's the thing which I said to the Lord ago (or maybe kanina lang): Lord, if you'll give her to me, I'll treat her the way you want me to treat her. But I'll not, and never think of her for the mean time kasi may misyon pa po tayo di ba?

ryanestandarte
08.01.21, 11:40 PM
grabe yun apat na beses niligawan taz apat na beses ni reject... buhay ka pa nun? <aray ku po>


That's how much I love her e. But the funny thing was that her conductor then (yes, singer siya like me) e nanghinayang sa akin kasi noong lumayo siya while I was courting her, doon din ako lumayo. How sad di ba?

(Lord, sana don't bring the feeling back again. I'm happy with what I am now for You. :) )

royal haggardness
08.01.22, 05:09 AM
Since nasa love naman tayo, here's my question:

Would it be possible to think na the reason you can't be with someone that you really, really, really, really love is that you're not yet ready for that relationship with her, thus cirumstances are molding you to be together?

I may not be the right person to give an advice about "love" however i just can't help but give my insights. :)

People come into our lives for a reason, just the same when people leave us. They're there because there's something we have to learn from them. And whether we like it or not, there will come a time that they'll leave us. Not because they want us to be hurt but because they've already taught us what needs to be learned. Most often than not, it would be very hard to accept (trust me!). It would literally crush your whole being. But you know what, painful as it is, you're left with no recourse but to accept things as they are, no IFs, no BUTs.

If people who left us keep on coming back, that only means, there's still more to be taught and learned. Just think of it this way, we are given to another person for a purpose. Same goes with them being in our lives. Let's thank God for this opportunity and for the people He brought our way.

Rejection is not at all a bad thing. Consider it as a learning experience.

kaya maswerte ang prince mo someday kasi bihira sila makakahanap ng mga tulad nating makulet.. tayo ang mag-aad ng spice sa buhay nila.. ahehehehee :))

I concur sis!

titopao
08.01.22, 08:47 AM
I like how the pace of this discussion is picking up LOL

grabe yun apat na beses niligawan taz apat na beses ni reject... buhay ka pa nun? <aray ku po>

Oo nga, antibay ni ryan, no? :)

cguroh, mas mabuting magmahal nalang ng walang hinihintay... well, tsaka ang love naman, hindi lang naman pang magkasintahan eh, pwede rin sa family and diba?

True, true. Ang irony nga minsan, kung kailan mo sya hindi ine-expect, saka darating sa 'yo ang pag-ibig. Kaya nga kung ako, mas gusto ko lang na tuloy ang buhay kasi hindi ko rin masasabi kung ano ang darating sa kin.

<naalala ko tuloy yung kwento ng misis dun sa wowowee ata, magmamadre daw siya, di pa daw siya naiinvolve sa isang relasyon dati kaya ang pinagawa sa kanya ng mga madre, pina involve sa isang relasyon, matapos nun, di na bumalik sa pagiging madre... haha>

May mga nagsabi sa akin na pag nag-aapply raw sa seminaryo ang isang lalaki, isa daw sa mga tinatanong ay kung siya daw ba ay nagka-girlfriend na. Kasi daw kung napapansin nila na ang only reason kaya interesadong pumasok sa pagpapari ay either dahil sa rejected or hindi pa talaga nakakaranas magmamahal, pinapayuhan daw na baka hindi pa natagpuan ng applicant ang kanyang true callin. (I think nangyari ito sa ka-batch ng kapatid ko, isa yata yon sa mga sinabi dun sa kanya.) So I think may bahid ng katotohanan yung kwento nung misis sa Wowowee.


her conductor then (yes, singer siya like me) e nanghinayang sa akin kasi noong lumayo siya while I was courting her, doon din ako lumayo. How sad di ba?

True, sad 'yon. And I should know...dahil parang ganyang-ganyan ang nangyari sa akin noon (somewhat).



People come into our lives for a reason, just the same when people leave us. They're there because there's something we have to learn from them. And whether we like it or not, there will come a time that they'll leave us. Not because they want us to be hurt but because they've already taught us what needs to be learned. Most often than not, it would be very hard to accept (trust me!). It would literally crush your whole being. But you know what, painful as it is, you're left with no recourse but to accept things as they are, no IFs, no BUTs.

If people who left us keep on coming back, that only means, there's still more to be taught and learned. Just think of it this way, we are given to another person for a purpose. Same goes with them being in our lives. Let's thank God for this opportunity and for the people He brought our way.

Abi, given the little that I know about you, I can only agree :)

May times sa buhay natin na nasasabi nating hindi natin matanggap na iniwan tayo ng ibang tao. Minsan, kailangan din nating mag-take ng isang step back at pagnilayang mabuti kung bakit kailangang umalis sa piling natin ang ibang tao. Baka nga andun lang sa harap natin ang mga sagot sa tanong natin na "bakit?" ngunit hindi (o ayaw) lang natin nakita noon.

Rejection is not at all a bad thing. Consider it as a learning experience.

Actually, pwede natin ito i-extend sa buong buhay natin. Hindi sa lagi tayong nakakaranas ng kaginhawahan sa buhay o ng ligaya. May mga panahong mabibigo rin tayo. Kaya't sa halip na hayaan natin itong maging balakid sa buhay, ang mga kabiguang ito ang syang nagbibigay sa atin ng aral na siya nating dapat tandaang mabuti. Tandaan: bago tayo natutong maglakad, nadapa tayo ng ilang ulit. Hindi mahalaga kung ilang ulit kang nadapa, basta't ang mahalaga ay naipakita mong kaya mong tumayo sa iyong mga paa.

ryanestandarte
08.01.22, 09:10 PM
True, sad 'yon. And I should know...dahil parang ganyang-ganyan ang nangyari sa akin noon (somewhat).


Oh yes. Pero like what I said, I have something to do pa. What ever happens, like yung pinadala ko sa kanyang message na may attached na video ng Philippine Male Singers, I'll be there for her. Hay...

PS: Tito Pao, pa-send po ng sheet music ng I'll be there sa email ko. Wahaha!! sniper_jare12@yahoo.com

zlftuyor
08.01.22, 09:17 PM
nice posts.

mary_ann
08.01.22, 09:39 PM
Hmmm...I think being in love means choosing to love that person everyday. You don't wake-up and just fall out of it.It's a constant decision we make everyday.

Love is basically something to decide on.. eventually. sounds cynical but from what I've observed it's true..hehe

simpatico
08.01.22, 09:50 PM
Naiinis ako kapag naiinlove ako.. kasi parang nalalayo ako kay Lord. We have to be careful to the ones we love. sometimes, sila ang nagiging dahilan kung bakit nalalayo tayo kay Lord.

ryanestandarte
08.01.22, 10:28 PM
Naiinis ako kapag naiinlove ako.. kasi parang nalalayo ako kay Lord. We have to be careful to the ones we love. sometimes, sila ang nagiging dahilan kung bakit nalalayo tayo kay Lord.

Here's what I wanted in a relationship (well sana nga ganun kasi iyon ang gusto ko): To have someone who is serving the Lord like I do. Like in my case: Ako e sa SFC pero yung gf ko e hindi. Minsan, nagtatampo siya sa akin kapag inuuna ko ang SFC than her. Pero thinking about it, it was God who gave her to me not the other way around di ba?

Honestly, I find it sweet na both of you are serving God. Kasi eventually, you will also serve your children in the future the way you serve God.

Tama ba ako? Comments please. :D

blueforgetmenot
08.01.22, 11:46 PM
Here's what I wanted in a relationship (well sana nga ganun kasi iyon ang gusto ko): To have someone who is serving the Lord like I do. Like in my case: Ako e sa SFC pero yung gf ko e hindi. Minsan, nagtatampo siya sa akin kapag inuuna ko ang SFC than her. Pero thinking about it, it was God who gave her to me not the other way around di ba?

Honestly, I find it sweet na both of you are serving God. Kasi eventually, you will also serve your children in the future the way you serve God.

Tama ba ako? Comments please. :D


very true! minsan nakakalungkot lang isipin na pagseselosan nya ang mga gingawa mo.. (like my case with my ex-bf kaya ng malaman ko yun parang nagbago yung nararmdaman ko sa kanya, ewan)mali ko lang dun dapat nagtiyaga ako na ilapit din siya kay god para nagtagal kami eh,

ryanestandarte
08.01.23, 12:47 AM
very true! minsan nakakalungkot lang isipin na pagseselosan nya ang mga gingawa mo.. (like my case with my ex-bf kaya ng malaman ko yun parang nagbago yung nararmdaman ko sa kanya, ewan)mali ko lang dun dapat nagtiyaga ako na ilapit din siya kay god para nagtagal kami eh,

Friend, here's my side. You don't have to somehow "force" him to go to God. Dapat yung bukal sa loob niya. Most of the time, ang pinag-aawayan namin is yung wala daw akong time for her dahil inuuna ko yung hawak kong choir bago siya. E that's my service to God. Buti sana kung it's for something like a performing choir di ba?

For me, a good relationship is someone who puts God first than anyone else. Someone who will see to it that he/she pleases God first. Kasi in that manner, you'll know that in the future you will have a family centered on God alone. :D

blueforgetmenot
08.01.23, 06:17 AM
Friend, here's my side. You don't have to somehow "force" him to go to God. Dapat yung bukal sa loob niya. Most of the time, ang pinag-aawayan namin is yung wala daw akong time for her dahil inuuna ko yung hawak kong choir bago siya. E that's my service to God. Buti sana kung it's for something like a performing choir di ba?

For me, a good relationship is someone who puts God first than anyone else. Someone who will see to it that he/she pleases God first. Kasi in that manner, you'll know that in the future you will have a family centered on God alone. :D


gusto ko na ilapit sya para maintindihan niya kung ano ang ginagawa ko, sa tingin ko pwde naman mging bukal sa loob nya yun kung minsan magustuhan niya, kaso di eh, wala tulad nito ngbreak nga kami
atsaka kaya mula nun di na ko umasa pa na makakahanap ng taong ganun, "someone who puts GOD first than anyone else"

naiintindihan kita dun.. ako sa hawak kong choir at minsan pti yung time na ina alot ko for studies.. nakipagbreak na rin ako para alang prob, kasi yun ang top 2 priorities kos buhay ko ngayon eh..

royal haggardness
08.01.23, 07:20 AM
My opinion,

Each one of us has his/her own priorities in life. For me, as long as you put God above anything else and you lift everything up to Him, everything will turn out fine.

However, I am not saying that you have to do away with all the things and people around you just to "Serve God". Why do you think God created them in the first place? Di naman siguro matutuwa si Lord if serve ka nga ng serve sa Kanya, tapos you tend to neglect your family, wala kang time sa friends mo, or sa partner mo. I'm pretty sure hindi naman magagalit si Lord if we get to balance our time and attention to the things and people who help us grow and make us a better person. Sometimes they tend to bring us closer to God, di lang natin napapansin. :)

And for those people na naghahanap ng partner na "SANA ganito sya...," just want to share this quote sent to me:

"Try to find what makes you happy and soon, you will end up with someone who saw in your completeness without ever wanting anything except to be a part of you and live the life you are living."

ryanestandarte
08.01.23, 09:49 AM
My opinion,

Each one of us has his/her own priorities in life. For me, as long as you put God above anything else and you lift everything up to Him, everything will turn out fine.

However, I am not saying that you have to do away with all the things and people around you just to "Serve God". Why do you think God created them in the first place? Di naman siguro matutuwa si Lord if serve ka nga ng serve sa Kanya, tapos you tend to neglect your family, wala kang time sa friends mo, or sa partner mo. I'm pretty sure hindi naman magagalit si Lord if we get to balance our time and attention to the things and people who help us grow and make us a better person. Sometimes they tend to bring us closer to God, di lang natin napapansin. :)

And for those people na naghahanap ng partner na "SANA ganito sya...," just want to share this quote sent to me:

"Try to find what makes you happy and soon, you will end up with someone who saw in your completeness without ever wanting anything except to be a part of you and live the life you are living."

True, true! Hehehe!!! Hay... love nga naman! Hehehe! :D

deathkill00008
08.01.23, 08:21 PM
AHMMM on my opinion naman... wala namang tao ang makakaisip ng ways ni God para sa atin ryt?

kaya medyo naano lang ako sa sinabi ni royal, na "di naman matutuwa si Lord...."

pero I understand na hinuha mu lang yun. ^_^

haaayyy... grabe talagah ang usapin tungkol sa love... ang hirap i judge kung tama o mali...

ahmmm another opinion, pag nainlove ka naman, di ba hindi mo naman kailangan na baguhin ang sarili mo para sa taong minamahal mo? siguroh hindi rin problema yung sinasabi nilang "napapalayo di umano sila kay Lord dahil sa love"

(ewan ko lang, sa totoo lang, hindi pa ako na iinvolve sa relationship pero nainlove na ko... hmmm kaya kung mali yung sinabi ko para sa inyo, sabihin niyo lang.)

centrunion
08.01.26, 07:42 AM
Love. Kanya kanya yan. Iba iba kasi tingin ng tao sa LOVE. For me, hindi ko siya macontrol. Basta na lang nararamdaman ko. Mabilis ako ma-inlove pero mabilis din magasawa. Nawawala pero kung minsan bumabalik.

centrunion
08.01.26, 07:44 AM
Love. Kanya kanya yan. Iba iba kasi tingin ng tao sa LOVE. For me, hindi ko siya macontrol. Basta na lang nararamdaman ko. Mabilis ako ma-inlove pero mabilis din magasawa. Nawawala pero kung minsan bumabalik. When I get involve in CHOIR, mas minamahal ko pa ang CHOIR kaysa sa GF ko. Actually, iyon ang dahilan ng break up.

ryanestandarte
08.01.26, 11:50 AM
Love. Kanya kanya yan. Iba iba kasi tingin ng tao sa LOVE. For me, hindi ko siya macontrol. Basta na lang nararamdaman ko. Mabilis ako ma-inlove pero mabilis din magasawa. Nawawala pero kung minsan bumabalik. When I get involve in CHOIR, mas minamahal ko pa ang CHOIR kaysa sa GF ko. Actually, iyon ang dahilan ng break up.

Ganun din ang usual na away namin. But I always tell her (which is true) that the choir is my service kay Lord. I tell her that if this is a performing choir, I'll understand. Pero lagi niyang sinasabi na mas may time ako sa choir than her when I do everything to balance it.

Hay... :(

jose
08.01.28, 10:02 AM
Hmmm...I think being in love means choosing to love that person everyday. You don't wake-up and just fall out of it.It's a constant decision we make everyday.

Love is basically something to decide on.. eventually. sounds cynical but from what I've observed it's true..hehe


familiar lines...uhmmm... i think i've heard this from someone's philosophy of love...

ryanestandarte
08.01.28, 10:38 AM
familiar lines...uhmmm... i think i've heard this from someone's philosophy of love...

agree. actually nga e, ito yung sinabi sa akin ng friend ko dati. :D

lordz
08.03.03, 10:48 AM
Hmmm. Is it possible to talk about "true love" without it being idealistic? Hmmm... i really dont know... :|

freespirit
08.03.05, 12:36 PM
Love cannot live where there is no trust.
You can't truly love others if you don't love your self.

yang ang natutunan ko sa book na nabasa ko.
At napatunayan ko ngayon sa relationship ko ngayon.

titopao
08.03.05, 12:47 PM
Hmmm. Is it possible to talk about "true love" without it being idealistic? Hmmm... i really dont know... :|

If you ask me, hindi naman maiiwasan. For that matter, there's this part of us where we tend to be idealistic---not just in (romantic) love but in life as well---say, when we talk of how things could have been or should be. I do not intend to suggest that, in itself, idealism (or a little of it) is a good thing or a bad thing, but that it is a part of our human nature that we must learn to accept, no matter how jaded we think we are. Ang hindi aim ng thread na ito is yung kind of idealism that is overly unrealistic (which, admittedly, is subjective).

jose
08.03.13, 09:59 AM
true titopao, very true!

rodalyn
10.05.21, 11:44 AM
:heart:Ang Puno't Dulo ng Pag-ibig:love:


Nakakatawa talaga ang love. Isa siyang napakalaking
oxymoron. Lahat ng pwede mong masabi sa kanya, baliktarin mo at totoo pa rin.:heart:

Ang labo diba? Pero ang linaw.???

Masaya magmahal. Malungkot magmahal. Di mo naiintindihan pero naiintindihan mo. Walang rason. Maraming rason.
Di mo na kaya, pero kaya mo pa rin. Masakit magmahal. Pero okey lang.:(

Shocks, ano ba talaga?!>:(

May kaibigan ako, sabi niya dati "Love is only for stupid people."
Nakakatawa kasi laude ang standing niya, pero dumating ang panahon, na-in-love din ang hunghang. At ayun, tanga na siya ngayon. Lahat kasi ng nahahawakan ng love nagiging oxymoron din. O kaya paminsan, nagiging moron lang.

Hindi lang kasi basta baliktaran ang pag-ibig. Lahat ng bagay nababaligtad din niya. Lahat ng malalakas na tao, humihina. Ang
mayayabang, nagpapakumbaba. Ang mga walang pakialam, nagiging Mother Teresa. Ang mga henyo, nauubusan ng sagot. Ang malulungkot, sumasaya.:D

Nakakatawa talaga. Lalo na kapag dumadating siya sa mga taong ayaw na talaga magmahal. Napansin ko nga eh. Parang kung gusto mo lang ma-in-love ulit, sabihin mo lang ang magic words na
"Ayoko na ma-inlove!" biglang WACHA! Ayan na siya.
Nang-aasar. Magpapaasar ka naman.::blush:

Di ba nakakatawa rin na pagdating sa problema ng ibang tao, ang galing galing mo? Pero 'pag problema mo na yung pinag-uusapan parang nawawalan ng saysay lahat ng ipinayo mo dun sa namomroblemang tao? Naiisip mong wala namang mali dun sa mga sinabi mo. Pero bakit parang wala ring tama????

Bali-baliktad din ang nasasabi ng mga taong tinamaan ng madugong pana ng pag-ibig. "Ngayon ko lang nalaman ganito pala.
Sabi ko na eh!" "Ang sarap mabuhay. Pwede na 'ko mamatay. Now na!"::glare:

At hindi lang 'yon. Ang sarap din pagtawanan ng mga taong alam naman nilang masasaktan lang sila eh magpapatihulog pa rin sa bangin ng pag-ibig. Tapos 'pag luray-luray na yung puso nila, siyempre hindi sila yung may kasalanan. Siya! "Bakit niya 'ko sinaktan?" May kasama pang pagsuntok sa pader yon, at pagbabagsak ng pinto.:O

Lupit talaga.:whistle:

Mauubos ang buong magdamag ko kakasabi ng mga
bagay na nakakatawa 'pag pag-ibig na ang pinag-usapan. Ang daming beses ko na kasi siya nakasalubong kaya masasabi ko nang eksperto na 'ko.

Pero wala pa rin akong alam.

Pero ang pinakanakakatawa sa lahat ay ang katotohanang kapag gusto magpatawa ng pag-ibig, ipusta mo na lahat ng ari-arian mo dahil siguradong ikaw ang punchline.LOL

Nakakatawa no?;D

Nakakaiyak.:cry:

emily
10.06.22, 10:48 PM
masarap ma-in-love. lalo na kung ung love mo eh love ka rin. pero dapat handa ka rin masaktan.

minsan ung isang friend ko nagtanong sa kin kung dapat n b syang makipag break sa bf nya kc napapagod n daw puso nya sagot ko sa kanya "napapagod ka n bang magmahal o napapagod ka lang intindihin ung mga kamalian nya?" kc para sa kin kapag nagmahal k di lang ung mga magagandang bagay n nasa kanya ang mahalin mo kc may mga kamalian ka rin na nagawa sa buhay mo.